FALL TO FLY (:
friendships
wrote a letter that shouldnt be read tilla few years down the road.played wing defence todayagainst U17.team with great sportsmanship i must say:)i need to sleep. so i was reading sth about friendships:)With some friends you just instantly feel like you've come home, but with most, it is a process of finding and becoming a home for each other. a home starts with just a shell...just a bare structure...four walls and a roof, a very basic and neccessary shelter to keep dry and safe. but then furniture needs to go in, and lights and all the little things that fill up rooms and make the nondescript places personal to you, your very own. the longer one stays in a home, the more stuff gets collected and the more personal it becomes.In short, Friendship is like a home, the more comfortable you get, the more at home you are... that one can come back to, after all our wanderings. i agree that friendships dont die for the very personal belief that what has been built has been built. but i do believe that this "built" relationship takes so much more than what we perceive to build, and then sustain. i used to think that the more u experience life together as friends, the less change can occur, thus the less we feel distant from each other. i still hold that true to a certain extent, but ive learnt that when we allow others into our inner most world, where we make ourselves most vulnerable emotionally to each other with good intention, thats where friendship is built. And what has been built has been built, and that episode can never be torn down unless we ourselves allow it too.Uncomfortable as it may be, the structure of the home still remains, even if left alone for very long spans of time. What has been built HAS been built, and that reality is something tangible indeed and very hard to tear down, as if it never was.Even if the shell of the home is all that is left, it stands as a reminder of a common space 2 people onced shared, even if they don't anymore.And i think...there is no lock on the door of a friendship. the friends who share (or shared) it can walk in and out of it at will. No one person owns the key to any friendship exclusively, because there is none to own. The friendship exists solely for those 2 friends and they have joint ownership of this property, whether they acknowledge it or realise it.i think friendships "die" when we are not there to experience the change in each others life, and so after a long period, we meet them up again and think to ourselves "they have changed so much", but really, sometimes its cos we werent there for them in those instances of change in their lives:) Sometimes one person remains alone in the house (it isn't a home when there is only one) and waits for a very long time for the return of the other. Sometimes the other may eventually return, or never. sometimes one returns only to find that the other had left just a moment before. Sometimes both just don't return, for various reasons.But whatever it is, i think...the friendship still remains, if only just a shell of something that once was a home, as long as those 2 who were friends still are alive. it may be long-neglected, dusty, moldy, decaying...but what was built HAS been built and it would take stronger hands than we have, to so demolish it so that it left not even a trace.And i think...that is both the beauty and the tragedy of friendships. sometimes you would almost hope that they could be removed without a trace....and other times, we are so grateful that they can't.many instances, we connotate friendships to happiness too flippantly. and i beg to differ from it, cos in friendships, theres beauty in tragedy, never just beauty.like it or not, everything boils down to choice, even something as natural as friendships and relationships:)
Blogged @ 1:50 AM